Wednesday, February 17, 2010

How is summer going to be?

For 5 wonderful years we lived in Ventura, just 5 minutes from the beach. We were there as often as possible. I'd take the kids to Marina Park to watch the sunset and play before Rick got home. The kids both caught their first fish off Ventura Pier and in the beginning of all of Jordan's issues we'd take her fishing after her appointments. It was something she wanted to do.

Now that we're back in SCV we're about 1 hour from the water. It's not bad but it's not like we can just up and leave for an hour or 2. Now it's a day trip. Last summer I was sick. We never once made it out to the beach. I was too tired or I hurt.

I'm not supposed to be out in the sun. The UV rays can trigger a flare which makes me miserable. Both Jordan and I are on meds that make us burn very easy. I am anal about putting sunscreen on the kids but I often forget to lotion up myself... or maybe it's just denial that the sun hurts me too. Matthew needs to learn how to swim. I want him to learn this year. I want to take the kids out on the bike path and ride everyday like other families do.

How do I do these things when even the simplest things like going to the market wear me out? Even putting away yarn from projects I've finished made me want to nap. How do people with extreme fatigue and pain function? Going to church for a few hours once a week takes a toll on me so how am I going to keep 2 kids happy when they're on vacation this summer? It's not fair to them to sit around all summer and be bored.

Not sure what the point of this is but I've been wondering about this a lot. I guess at this point all I can do is pray that these meds help so we can be a "normal" family again.

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