I don't know how many people are like me but I hate taking medication. Since I have lupus, I don't really have a say in the matter anymore. I have to take meds in order to keep my disease in check. It doesn't mean I like it but if I want to have a 'normal' life I need to. There is one medication that I do have control over. My pain meds. I avoid taking the good stuff and usually try to get by with Motrin or Advil. There are days when the OTC stuff just doesn't cut it and today was one of those days.
I don't want to become addicted or dependent on Rx drugs but the reality is I AM dependent on them. There is a difference between the 2. Addiction is where you will do anything and everything to get what your body craves. I depend on percocet or tramadol to get me through the bad days. I depend on it to help me function just like I depend on my husband and other family & friends when I'm flaring.
Anyone who knows me, knows that I'm not an addict. I've never done any illegal drugs and I rarely drink. It's just not me. That's probably why I have a hard time taking my good stuff. I was afraid of becoming addicted to narcotics. Obviously, I have a need for them and if my doctors thought I was an addict I wouldn't be getting the Rx. If I were an addict I'd be popping pills like they were candy. But I wait until my pain is so bad that I'm miserable before I take something. How many others do the same thing?
Some of you know that our family lives with my husbands Grandma. Over the last 20 years I have seen this woman survive breast cancer. Then colon cancer. In 2007 she found another lump. We assumed it was scar tissue since it was on the same side as the breast cancer from years before. The biopsy came back and it was cancer again. She began treatment again only this time it wasn't working. The cancer spread to her bones. Her spine, shoulder, skull, pelvis and sternum are all involved. Last August she fell and shattered her elbow. Three weeks ago she was reaching for something and broke her collarbone.
This woman knows pain. Like me, she doesn't like taking pain meds. A few weeks ago she was so miserable. She couldn't get comfortable and was up all night. Her nurse came the next day and said "Pain meds are our friend! You take them when you need them. That is why we have them!" Ever since then Granny is taking her meds regularly and she has been feeling much better. We adjust meds as needed so she's comfortable.
Why do I think I'm different? Why do I have such a hard time taking that pill that will make me feel better? Pain is pain. It makes us grumpy unhappy people who don't enjoy life. I don't want to be grumpy all the time and not enjoy my kids.
So, I need to remember that pain meds are my friend! Do you?